I was never really comfortable with the terms lead and follow in dance.  Are you?

I have  stated in the past that lead and follow requires equality and that the follower is really in as much control of the dance as the leader.

Negative Perception

For many people, especially ladies, The term follow is not a popular word.   When people hear “Follow”, they seem to think it means do what you are told and you have no choice.  Lead also tends to have similar negative impact, being perceived as command .

Following is active, not passive and Leading is part following and can only be accomplished if the leader is GIVEN authority, by the follower.

I was going to write this article myself, when I ran across the same subject written by Richard Powers.   I like the way he describes lead and follow as tracking and interpreting.  See what you think.

Read Richard Powers – Ultimate Partnering

As a leader, how much are you following?

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Matching Resistance

Matching resistance is a critical element in creating good connection. To create this connection the follower needs to be in the man’s right hand.  To create a connection with your partner in the closed ballroom position, the follower must match the resistance of the leader’s right hand with her left shoulder blade.

This is achieved by the follower pulling her left shoulder back and down pressing into the leader’s hand.  With no matching resistance, the follower will simply collapse into the leader and there is no communication and no way for him to lead at this point.

Skippy Blair says: .Matching the resistance, is also known as The Law of Opposition. It tells us that every action has an equal and opposite reaction. A push meets with a push. A pull meets with a pull. In dance, the resistance is NOT actually pushing or pulling. It is a matching “reaction” to the “action” of the lead. The natural tendency to “yield” to a “lead” rather than to match the natural resistance is a real problem for many dancers.

With good matching resistance, comes good frame and good frame means both leader and follower will enjoy their time together on the dance floor.

How has matching resistance improved your dance?

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How we apply our lead can have great influence on our partner’s balance.  The proper application of Tangential Momentum in your lead will increase your partner communication and help her maintain balance.

I recently traveled to Dallas on business and while there, I was able to schedule a lesson with Beata (like the car Miata with a B) Howe.    She is a three time US Open Swing Champion and an excellent teacher. Click Here for more information on her website.

Anytime I travel, I look for a West Coast Swing instructor that is considered the best in the area.   Each time I do this, I come away humbled by how much I don’t know about this dance.  This trip was no exception.

We reviewed many things, including fine tuning connection and hand hold as well as frame.   What is great about each lesson is the gold nugget I always come away with.  In this case there were several, but tangential momentum really stood above the rest.

Tangential Momentum is the application of force across the plane of motion.

A great example of this is spinning a basketball on your finger.   When the ball is spinning, force must be consistently applied to keep it going.  If you apply this force incorrectly, then you lose control of the ball, but if you apply force on the tangent or parallel to the spin, then the ball keeps going and you do not effect the balance.

In West Coast Swing, this means that we should always apply force parallel to the slot.

In the context of our lead and follow, we are talking about energy transfer,  creating leverage and compression, not hauling someone around on the dance floor so keep in mind that force is simply a word to represent the application of energy such as in a tuck turn.  We would apply force/compression to transfer the followers forward energy to backward and turning energy to create the tuck and turn.

Now, let’s get back to the subject.   A good example and where she got me was on left side passes with outside turns.   It is a common tendency to start the outside turn by applying force out and around your partner in an attempt to drive the turn all the way around.   What should happen though is quite different and has a surprising affect.    As you lead the pass, rather than applying force across the slot, pushing outside and throwing your partner off balance, apply the force in the parallel or tangent to the slot.  This means you are actually driving toward her right side in the direction she is coming from, opposite her direction of travel.   No, you won’t stop her since you are not in her line of travel, she will continue forward but the reverse force will cause her to spin to the outside.  This will all happen with no negative result on her balance.

So to apply force in turns, we should consistently pull inside turns and drive outside turns.   Again, pull and drive are not meant to describe lead, but to indicate direction of lead and how to lead it. If this is confusing, then talk to me or find someone to show you what this feels like.    One more time… Don’t push or pull your partner!!!!

One thing to note here.  When applying force it is not so much forcing back down the slot as it is just enough to stop that side of her body, effectively applying breaks to only one side.    Did you ever ride a Big Wheel as a kid?  Am I dating myself here?  Well, if you have, you know what happens when you stop one wheel.   It will spin and so will she.

Since my lesson with Beata, I have paid close attention to this and have found it to be an absolute rule one hundred percent of the time.

So,  give it a try.  Did it work for you?

What is Musicality?

Webster Defines Musicality as:

1. Sensitivity to, knowledge of, or talent for music
2. The quality of being musical

For a dancer it means to make the dance fit the music.  This in turn means using movement to represent and emphasize the tempo, harmony, melody and vocals in a song.

Adding musicality to your dance requires some understanding of the structure of the music itself.  It also means you must be connected to the music.

Click Here for suggestions of good West Coast Swing music.  Pick out some and see how the information in this article applies to them.

Don’t worry,  it’s not as hard as it sounds.  Music is not as hard to understand as many believe.  In fact,  equipped with just a little knowledge we can begin to identify repeating and predictable patterns within music that will allow us to connect to it and make our dance fit the music.

Note:  There are always exceptions, but in general these guidelines below will hold true most of the time.

Characteristics of Music

Most every song follows a pattern that can be identified. This pattern, once recognized will usually be repeated several times.

The Down Beat

For this discussion, we will say every measure has 4 beats so when we talk about the down beat, we are really talking about the odd numbered beats.  These will be more emphasized such as with a stronger drum beat.   Most people can find this by clapping to the music.    Often you will see a group of people at concerts, shows, etc,  clapping.  If you pay attention, they are most likely clapping to the down beat of 1 and 3.   You will probably find it difficult to clap on the 2 and 4.  Give it a try.  I bet you have to make a conscious effort to clap on the up beat.

To illustrate, listen to Billy Joel’s  The Longest Time.  This song uses snapping of the fingers to emphasized the up beats on 2 and 4.    See if you can hear it and if it sounds unusual to you.  You may have noticed something different about this song previously, but were unable to identify it.

Phrases

In How To Identify Dance Music Part 1 and Part 2 I talked a little about mini and basic phrases and will go into a bit more depth here.

Understanding phrases is necessary to know when a song will hit a break.  A typical song will begin with an introduction followed by a 32 beat phrase.  This phrase will have a number of characteristics. within this phrase, there will probably be a set of 4 vocal verses.  each time the verse section repeats, this pattern will repeat and the verse section will usually be followed by a chorus.

If the verse section is 32 beats then the chorus will usually be as well.  Once you have heard one verse section and one chorus you will be able to predict the rest of the song because it will simply repeat. Occasionally, you will find a song that has a  bridge which is a smaller phrase (usually 24 beats) between a chorus and a verse section or replacing a portion of the verse section. This will usually only happen once if you encounter it and the song will return to it’s predictable pattern and usually only one chorus will follow a bridge before the end of the song.

Some songs that are blues or swing based may exhibit another characteristic.  during the verse section you will hear four vocal verses, but the last verse (or last half of the last verse) will be accented by either a stop in the music or the only instrument will be a percussion.  since a phrase is 32 beats and there are 4 verses, we know that there are 8 beats per verse.  knowing this and that the last verse will be without instruments or only percussed behind the vocals, we can apply a number of breaks, tricks and delays in our dance to accent the music.

Listen to this example:   I Feel So Good by Tracy Nelson

This sample actually starts at the end of a chorus, but you will hear the beginning of the next phrase and the following 4 verses.

down by the station
suitcase in his hand
my my babys’ coming home
lord don’t he look grand

verse 1 – 3 is accompanied by instruments but in verse 4 she sings unaccompanied.    You will also notice that in verse 3 her voice changes adding a bit more emphasis as if building to something.  The end of the verse is also emphasized by a strong percussion behind the word Lord of the last verse.    Once we here this and listen to the chorus, we can be fairly sure that the next verse section will follow this same pattern and we know when to hit the break.

Breaks and play can be applied also to the end of a phrase.  In some songs, if you count out a basic 32 phrase, you will hear towards the end, the music building towards a climax. this climax is often on the 28th beat leaving the last measure for emphasis (no music) then resuming on the 1 beat of the next phrase.

If the particular song apples a longer or shorter break or some variation,  you will be able to anticipate it after you hear the first break, because more often than not, it will repeat the pattern.

Once you understand the basics of phrasing, you will know what a song is going to do within the first 30 seconds even if you have never heard the piece before.  This  does not means you have to count the phrases, since you can sense the climax of the phrase approaching and know when it’s going to break and when it will resume.

Some blues music is phrased in 16 or even 24 beats per phrase, but even then you will find the pattern repeating after the first two to three phrases.

Hitting the Breaks

You might ask, ok, I understand this but how do i use it?  The easiest thing to start with is the break or stop.  when you know the break  is coming,  send your partner on a left or right pass or turn or whatever so that she ends  her motion on the 28th  beat.  then hold her there through the break.  resuming on the next 1 beat. You can emphasize this with a slow drawing together of the feet or an arm motion so it looks like continual motion and you don’t look like you are just standing there.

This is not always easy to do, but with some practice you can begin to get the timing right.  You can also apply this break in the middle of certain patterns such as tucks.  Simply applying a stop or pause to the pattern (remember to apply some perpetual motion with feet or arms) will work for starters.   Once you get to a point where you can hit the breaks, you will be able to add other types of breaks.

Hitting these breaks effectively also give the ladies good opportunity to play.

Emphasizing Vocals and Melody

You don’t have to dance on the Beat but you still have to stay on Beat.

What?  How is that possible?????

This gets a little tricky and is usually reserved for when you are at an advanced level and fully understand your timing as well as the music.

Sounds like a I’ve completely contradicted everything you’ve ever been told about dancing doesn’t it?  How can I possibly tell you not to dance on the beat when that’s exactly what has been drilled into you over and over again.    You are supposed to dance on the beat and stay on time.

WCS allows great of flexibility but only as long as you stay within the overall timing of the dance.   What am I talking about here?  I ‘m talking about footwork and lead that is not necessarily placed on the rhythm.   This is not something you do all the time or for very long.  Usually only for one or two measures and only to add emphasis and styling to the dance.

There are several ways to do this.  First you can change your foot work to emphasize a certain vocal pattern or series of lyrics, such as drawing out a step across several beats to match the vocalist who draws out one word.  This will usually be either 2 beats or a full measure.   Another possibility is accelerating steps or syncopating steps to match lyrics that are faster than the rhythm of the song.

Second,  along with the rhythm there is also the melody of the song.  This can be almost any instrument and you will recognize distinctive patterns that you can apply syncopated or extended footwork and lead too that will add style and characteristics to your dance that are uniquely your own.   Once again, this us usually something you would apply only within a single measure,  possibly two on rare occasions.

Know your Music

I saved this for last and it is the simplest of all.  Just become familiar with the songs you enjoy when dancing.  Good dance music is played frequently so if the song is popular, it’s likely you will hear it again soon.  Once you know the song,  you will have a much easier time hitting those breaks and emphasizing song.

As this subject is nearly impossible to explain clearly without some visual example, I am planning a class on accenting melody and vocals in the near future.

One more thing.  Although this is focused on West Coast Swing,  the understanding of music and applying musicality can be applied to all forms of dance to some degree or another.

One More thing

One of the greatest aspects of West Coast Swing is the mindset of freedom and possibilities.  It is definitely not a dance based on rigid rules but on the freedom to be creative and flexible, to adapt and accept the chance intrustions that can influence the dance and make it something much more than just a set of patterns.

In her original 1978 description of “West Coast Swing – Golden State Swing” Skippy Blair wrote:

• The most fascinating part of swing dancing is the individuality of the dancers.
• Patterns are taught to learn to move with ease in all directions.  Styling comes from knowing basic patterns so well that the mind no longer needs to think about the pattern.  Stylings are flexible… the style one chooses should be as individual as the clothes one chooses to wear.
• The only problem that exists in swing is when someone decides there is only ONE WAY to dance it.  (The caps were hers.)

How do you apply styling and musicality to your dance?

The more I learn about West Coast Swing, the more I find there is to learn.  If you want to see how deep the rabbit hole really goes, then read on.  The links below are to various writings by Skippy Blair.

Who is Skippy Blair – Click Here?

Although quite technical at times, the information in these articles is some of the most extensive information you will find.  You may not have heard of Skippy, but the people you have heard of in the West Coast Swing community consider her the teacher’s teacher.

She is the creator of the Universal Unit system of annotation and has developed concepts such as Rolling Count, Centering Knob, 3-Toe base and Plusing which are fundamental to West Coast Swing today.

ANCHORS in West Coast Swing
Because of recent Intensives, discussions with judges, contestants, and even potential judges, we have netted new insights into the art of “anchoring.

Centering
Centering – The US OPEN, year after year, is a huge success and yet many performances could be improved – simply by using the rules of “Partner” Centering. In studying the “Psychology of Learning” – I was fascinated with how “Rules of learning” carried over into the dance. We learn MUCH faster if we have one definition for one word.  Study also confirmed my belief that simplicity is the key to fundamental learning.

Coordination Testing
Coordination testing has proven to us, that there are specific techniques that can raise our physical and mental performance level.  Any dancer working toward a higher skill level, can continually raise their level of performance, by drilling the Rhythms and Movement techniques that produce the dance skills listed below

Critical Timing
Critical timing and the “2-Beat” Rhythms: I do believe in “Staying within the Rules” – but there are times when I momentarily find exceptions to those rules. I say “momentarily” because when I stop – step back – and take a second look – I find that the rule was correct. So far, each experience has proven that RULES are more important than any momentary “shortcut”. Many times we only think we are breaking a rule – when we are simply not fully understanding the depth of the rule. I marvel at how rules unfold gradually, revealing their secrets to us, one at a time.

Downbeats and Upbeats
Downbeats occur on counts 1, 3, 5, and 7 of an 8-Beat Mini-phrase. Upbeats occur on counts 2, 4, 6, and 8 of an 8-Beat Mini-phrase. The Downbeat comes first, followed by the Upbeat. So what is missing when someone asks: ‘”How do I tell a Downbeat from an Upbeat?”

Pulsing: Heartbeat of the Dance
There are two different concepts that are often mistaken for each other. Pulsing is an underlying basic rhythmic movement of the CPB, within the framework of the body. It is a subtle, but “constant” heartbeat of the dance that takes place even if there is no music playing. Musical Interpretation is the added spice that connects the body to a variety of interesting, often syncopated, sounds in the music. They are two entirely different aspects of a performance.

Relationships
Lead her GENTLY and she’ll follow you anywhere. 2. Never CRITICIZE a Partner. The only person you can FIX is YOU. (The person responsible for making an ADJUSTMENT, is the one who knows an adjustment needs to be made.)….

Rolling Count
In “Classic” West Coast Swing, “Critical Timing” and Rolling Count create the MAGIC that separates the Amateur from the Professional. It is this MAGIC that thrills an audience and excites a Performer. Many performers are unaware of what creates their own magic. Those who aspire to make a little magic of their own – are delighted to hear that this “magic” can be learned.

Single Tracking
Start with picturing one single line on the floor in front of you. Your body – (actually, your Center Point of Balance) – wants to glide down that straight line. The Sending Foot propels the body forward, along that straight line. In order for the center to travel in a straight line, the shoulders move slightly back, alternating left and right, in order to accommodate the forward movement of the center. (Contra-Body)

3-Toe Base
“Toe Base” itself has already become a common term, relating to the area starting where the base of the toes connect to the rest of the foot and ending at the front end of the bottom of the toes. Confining that toe base to the Big Toe – and the two toes NEXT to the big toe – has made a dramatic impact on quite a few dancers. Dancing a “check” in any direction – using a “3-Toe Base” simply means that the ball of the foot is not touching the floor and the little toe is “at rest” during this action. This “3-Toe Base” produces a stronger “change of direction” in any “check” move – and also produces a stronger body connection to the floor.

Walk Like a Dancer
A Dancer moves through space by the carefully studied use of body control. The “Center Point of Balance” (Solar Plexus) moves upward as the toes press DOWN into the floor. Learning to Dance is much more rewarding when the secret of controlling the “Center Point of Balance” (CPB) has been mastered

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As men, we often ask ourselves what do  women want and it seems to be a mystery to many.   ….

Is it possible that what women want in life is the same thing they look for in dance?   I hear over and over again from dance instructors the following statement in one form or another.  “Guys, this is the one place you are in charge”.   Is this really true?  I wonder.

We live in a society today that has taken something critical from men.   Our Masculinity and Authority.  Gone are the days of strong men.

TV has an interesting way of portraying current social stigmas and stereotypes.  TV used to be filled with strong male leads as fathers and husbands.  Men of strong conviction, character and integrity.  Men such as Charles Engels (Little House on the Prarie) are gone only  to be replaced with men like Ray Barone (Everybody Loves Raymond) who are nothing more than  incompetent man-children, barely leaving behind adolescence despite their age.

Commericals barrage us with scenes of the lost and ignorant husband unable to comprehend the simple fact that the wife just got wireless internet in their house and she has to patiently explain to the moron of a husband that he no longer needs a cable to print his stupid worthless document.  Yeah,  I added the stupid, worthless part.

How did we get to a point where our society’s view of men is a hapless, spineless, bumbling bunch of idiots? or is it?

Where am I going with this?   I promise this train of thought does actually have a caboose.

I’m not going to go into how we got here as that is a bigger subject and could fill a book.  OK, it’s already filled many books so I doubt I have anything to add.  So I’m going to talk about it from another angle.

Ladies,  I ask you one honest simple question.  Do you want to be the leader in your relationship or would you prefer a strong, capable, confident, respectful, trusted man take that role?   I ask it this way simply because if I asked if you would want to follow the leadership of Ray Barone, the answer would be obvious….NO.

Now for the point.  I suspect that the same traits women look for in a strong dance leader might also be the same they would find appealing in a relationship.

Last year I wrote a two part series: 9 Traits of a Real Man  Part 1 and Part 2.  Part 1 links to an article by Bobbi Wingham (a woman) and her views on Masculine Men.  In Part 2, I apply these traits to the dance floor.

As a man, I seriously doubt that I could do a better job of describing the traits women want in a man better than Bobbi did.  You may or may not agree with her but I challenge you to find anything negative in the traits she lists.

Read part 1, and Bobbi’s article, then read part 2.  When you done, come back here and finish this one.  Don’t worry,  I will wait.

Queue the elevator music……….

So what did you think?  Agree?   disagree?

I’ve come to beleive that in life, just as in dance,  women want strong men to be in charge.  Not just on the dance floor, but off as well.  Men, We have abdicated our position of authority by simply not living up to it.    I’ll illustrate with dance

Dance is a partnership and connection is critical.  I write often about connection in dance, in frame, to the music and especially to your partner.  Men, If you do not maintain connection to your dance partner, they will be forced to lead themselves.   Here is a revelation for you.  She doesn’t want that.  She wants you to take control of the dance.

In life,  it might be said that she wants the same thing which is  Strong Leadership.   Now before you go getting mad at me, did you read part 1 and part 2?????   Well, then go ahead and read Lead and Follow: Part 3 – I Lead, You Follow, But Who’s In Charge? .

I’m not talking about leadership that is “do what I say or else”.  I’m talking servant leadership that is selfless, respectful, trusted, protective, nurturing.

I’m going to list some qualities of a good leader as they apply to the dance floor.   When I’m done, I have a question  for the ladies.

• A leader will have most or all of the 9 Traits of a Masculine Man
• Leadership is a burden, a leader must be able to gain support from the follower.
• A leader must be trusted by the follower
• Leadership cannot be taken or forced, only granted.  Force does not equal leadership
• A leader must be strong and firm, but gentle.
• A leader must be Respectful, placing her in a position of high honor.
• A leader must allow her freedom to express herself, to be heard, and allowed to grow.
• Leadership requires humility.  Never draw attention to your own skill. Let others do it for you.
• A leader accepts the follower, not as an equal, but as one esteemed above himself and of greater importance

When I go to dance, I like to sit and talk with the ladies.  Well, who doesn’t, but I listen to what they have to say about us men and let me tell you guys……they do talk about us.   I don’t mean to imply that they gossip, but they do comment  who they enjoy dancing with and why.    Guess what,  the single most talked about issue is consistently our ability, or lack there of, to lead.   I have yet to hear one lady say “that guy didn’t do enough patterns with me”.    I often hear the following:

• I could not follow his lead
• he was too rough
• His lead was too soft
• and so on and so on and so on

I can’t speak for the ladies.  I can only convey the message that has been given to me over and over again.  Here it is.

A simple dance executed well and lead confidently is infinitely better than a complicated one lead poorly.  Maybe there is a life lesson here.

In 5 Tips for Ballroom Beginners , I mention two things.  Do a few things well, rather than many poorly and focus on the basics.  This means many things but in this case it means constantly work to improve your ability to lead both on and off the dance floor.

So ladies….In dance and life, do you really want to be in charge or do you do it because you you feel you have to or nobody will be in charge? I’d really like to hear your answer to this question.

Men… Can you be these things on and off the dance floor?

Everyone?  Does this rambling make sense or am I just full of it??????

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Have you ever stopped to consider how much your head weighs?  On Average about 12 pounds.  That may not sound like much, but when it’s sitting on top of your body it can have an exaggerated impact on your balance and the way your body moves.

Your head can influence your body in two primary ways.

Balance

Good balance comes from understanding your Center Point of Balance. Imagine putting your fist inside body right below the area where your rib cage comes together. This is your center point of Balance.

Although this center never changes, it’s influence on your dance does depending on a number of things.  Such as stance and arm positioning.  However, the one thing that can affect your balance more than any other is your head.

Consider a sledge hammer.  The handle, by itself is not particularly difficult to manage, but put the weight of the hammer head on the end and it radically changes the balance and makes it more difficult to handle.

Your head has the same exaggerated influence on your body.  If your head is in the wrong position, it will cause you balance problems.

A simple exercise will illustrate this.  Stand on one foot and then tilt your head forward until you are looking down at the ground or back till you are looking straight up.  I’m betting your balance was effected or maybe it even forced you off balance.

Directional Tendencies

We know that the position of our head can change our balance but another way it influences our body is by the direction we are looking.

Your body naturally follows the head’s direction.  If you are looking a particular direction, your body has a natural tendency to move in that direction.

A great illustration of this is driving.  Have you ever been driving down the road and looked to one side at something for a little too long and when you looked back at the road, found that your vehicle is drifting somewhat in the direction you were looking?  Your visual gaze had an influence on your arms and they reacted by moving towards your gaze.  By the way,  I am not suggesting you try this.  If you have never noticed it, just trust me.  It works!!

You visual gaze can have the same impact on dance.  When we dance foxtrot and go from basic to promenade, we are instructed to look in the direction of travel.  Why,  if we dance promenade looking at our partner, it changes how your body reacts.  Your partner can actually feel the difference.

Looking where you are going will also keep you from running someone over.

Putting it into Practice

Practice keeping your head centered above your body.  Feel the back of your neck and find the vertebrate where your neck ends and your back begins.  You can feel the first bone that doesn’t move when you move your head front to back like a chicken.  Silly, I know, but it gets the point across.

This is the Centering Knob. Pressing that knob straight back as you go into movements controls your posture and will greatly improve you balance as well as power and control of movement.

Pressing this knob back actually tilts your chest cavity into a more optimal posture and gives the feeling of tightening and shortening the muscles around the center spine area as well as the front part of the chest.  This will also allow you greater breath control and, most importantly, centers the head directly over the spine for precise balance control.

Give it a try.  Did it work for you?  Tell me how it changed your dancing?

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Partner Communication is critical to effective lead and follow.   The link is to an eHow video that gives a decent description of partner communication and a few exercises you can use to improve your lead and follow.
Partner Communication Video

In this video, you will learn the basics of partner communication techniques.

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Partner Communication is critical to effective lead and follow.  Maintaining connection is always a challenge.  This video demonstrates the basics of partner communication techniques and a couple of exercises you can use to improve your lead and follow.

Partner Communication

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Frame

frame is the key to good lead and follow, but it’s also the responsibility of both partners.   Although good frame and/or connection is critical to all dances, this article is focused mainly on smooth, closed position dances such as Waltz or Foxtrot.  So how do we establish a good frame?

First, Good frame starts with your arms, keeping them up and toned.   I have been occasionally asked what I mean when I say toned and the best way I can describe it is to say it’s just enough tension in the muscles to hold the arm in a given position.  This means that it is very light, but firm enough to communicate to the partner.

Second,  Good frame means your bodies relative position is slightly to the right of each other.   If you stand in front of your partner, the buttons on the man’s shirt should be close the lady’s shoulder.   Imagine the space between the Ladies head and right shoulder as your window and try to look out that window at all times.    You may be tempted to look into her eyes, but in so doing, you will have a tendency to drift back in front and into her space.

Third, The man’s arm should be around the lady, with his wrist high under her shoulder and his right hand on her left shoulder blade.  Keep the fingers together and pointed down slightly.    The ladies’ left arm should be placed on top of the man’s arm with her left hand resting softly on his shoulder.  Fingertips on the outside and thumb on the inside, but not gripping the man’s arm.

Fourth, The Man’s left arm should be extended from the side with the hand positioned at a height which is comfortable for the lady.  Due to my height, I sometimes have a tendency to raise my hand at a level that can be uncomfortable for some women so I have to remain conscious of this at all times.    The upper arm should be sloped down slightly and the upper arm slightly up.   The lady’s palm shoud rest in the man’s palm with her fingers between his fingers and thumb, then both fold fingers over the others hand (GENTLY).   Each partner should keep their wrists straight and support their own weight.

Fifth,  The lady should settle into the mans left arm comfortably providing the necessary connection.  The lady should feel a light connection with the man’s hand on her back.

Finally, Maintain good posture stretching your body upwards, fill your lungs and keep your shoulders back and hips in.

With the proper frame, the man’s intention are easily understood by the lady through both arms and the torso position of the man.   Maintaining a good frame through proper tone and a stable upper body will greatly improve both yours and your partner’s enjoyment.

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